


show me where my armor ends

by iPhone



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Drama, F/F, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-14 23:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15399822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iPhone/pseuds/iPhone
Summary: Bechloe Week 2018 submission. Each chapter fulfills the day's theme.Beca and Chloe are both famous in their own right: Beca is an up and coming musician. Chloe is an adored movie and television actress. They meet one day, by chance, and find themselves very attracted to each other.





	1. high hopes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> day 1: accidental kiss.
> 
> Beca Mitchell meets Chloe Beale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come say hi to me on [tumblr](http://isthemusictoblame.tumblr.com/)! i promise to update the amnesia!au fic soon. :) fic title is from "pluto" by sleeping at last.

Beca Mitchell enjoys a love-hate relationship with the press.

On one hand, she knows it’s necessary for her career. On the other, she never quite knows exactly how to interact with interviewers - or at least, how to be particularly charming.

Despite her general lack of propensity for the charm and interview etiquette, she somehow manages to make it through her day-to-day responsibilities without too many hiccups. She enjoys that her publicist leaves her alone for the most part. She has a few rules here and there, which really, aren’t too bad because Beca kind of just wants to keep her head down anyway.

Something that Beca can say she loves about her career, however, is the sheer amount of attractive people that she meets on a day-to-day basis.

She’s had her fair share of celebrity crushes, but more importantly, they’ve been reciprocated more often than not.

Unfortunately, it would appear, to her publicist, that it is in her own best interest to keep her relationships underwraps, so Beca chooses to just enjoy the fact that she’s single, as far as anybody’s concerned.

Beca can’t believe how many people equally want to keep their dating history and/or sexualities under wraps, but she’s not really complaining. It gets her through the day.

It’s something that isn’t a necessarily a problem for Beca, that is, until she meets Chloe Beale.

Beca has never been quite so attracted to somebody before and the fact is, they just click. They meet at an afterparty for the Golden Globes for the first time and Beca thinks that Chloe might be flirting with her, but under the haze and dim lights, she’s not quite sure.

They share one dance, alcohol and adrenaline making their bodies move a bit more sensually than what Beca might deem appropriate for public appearances, but at that moment, with Chloe, she doesn’t necessarily care. She feels like she can breathe for the first time in years, since entering the hellhole that is Hollywood and the entertainment industry.

When it comes time for Beca to leave, lest she does something she knows she’ll regret like...kiss Chloe or something, she does so with a squeeze to Chloe’s forearm and an apology on her lips.

To her surprise, Chloe pulls her into a hug.

“Nice to meet you,” Chloe murmurs, tightening her grasp. “I’ve heard so much about you. I’m happy to meet the face behind the name, finally.”

Beca almost wants to ask what Chloe has heard exactly, maybe something along the lines of whether Chloe has heard only good things, but-

“Oh,” she replies articulately, when she pulls back. “I, uh, same,” she manages to say. She has never noticed quite how blue Chloe’s eyes are, and all she can do is stare for a few seconds longer than strictly necessary. Chloe’s bone structure is crazy. Beca kind of wants to touch Chloe’s face or something. She chalks it up to the alcohol.

Chloe kisses her on the cheek, letting her lips linger - or maybe Beca’s mind is working in slow motion.

She does find Chloe’s number tucked into her clutch, written on a piece of paper with a smudged lipstick kiss at the corner.

Understandably, it all spirals into a fast friendship from then on.

 

* * *

 

 

 **Chloe  
** _Why are you so talented?! I’m just casually texting my radio station to request your song again. Just once more should do it._

 **Beca**  
_I swear you single-handedly sent me to #1 lmaooo_

 **Chloe**  
_What can I say? I have good taste._

 

* * *

 

It makes sense in some respects - Chloe is an actress, starring in some popular Netflix series - one that just picked up a couple Emmy nods and Golden Globes over the award season. Even though she’s just part of another prong in the industry, Beca supposes they would have worked professionally together in some aspect sooner or later since she heard that Chloe has dabbled in singing from time to time.

Prior to the Golden Globes, Beca had heard of Chloe, vaguely, but never had the chance to interact with her. At least, not in a professional sense. That is, until the director for her upcoming music video informs her that they’ve decided to cast Chloe.

Beca approves in a heartbeat because she has been dying to see Chloe in person again, but their respective schedules just mean that they haven’t had time to hang out. Chloe is so pleasant and fun to talk to via text message and sporadic phonecalls, but Beca craves something a little more physical. Besides, Chloe is pleasant, talented, and, well, Beca has eyes.

Chloe is attractive as hell.

She’s kind of excited to see her again in the daylight.

“Hi,” Beca greets, shaking Chloe’s hand once she arrives on set. The California sun bears down on them unforgivingly, but Beca thinks Chloe looks beautiful, a little flushed, but dressed casually in jean shorts and a red and blue t-shirt. Her eyes light up when she takes in Beca, unabashedly giving her a quick once-over.

Chloe laughs, light and pleasant. “Come on, Bec. I don’t do handshakes. Hug?” she asks. Beca only laughs and meets Chloe halfway, allowing her to pull their bodies together in a warm embrace.

“How have you been?” Beca asks, quickly stuffing her hands in her pockets when she finds that she doesn’t want to let go of Chloe’s waist.

“Good, just working here and there. I had my agent put my name down for this shoot when I first heard about it. I hoped name-dropping you would bump me to the front of the list.”

“That eager to see me again, huh?” Beca replies quickly, finding her tongue suddenly unstuck.

“Well, I mean, you weren’t going to ask me to hang out, so…”

It makes Beca take pause, because Chloe’s tone is flirtatious if she has to describe it. “We’ve both been busy!” Beca exclaims, letting out a laugh.

“Yeah, sure, tell yourself that.” Chloe smiles, however, to let Beca know she means it all in jest. “I’m actually really excited we’re going to work together, finally. You’ll have to let me know if the acting bug ever comes to find you.”

Beca shudders at the thought. “I absolutely don’t think that’ll happen in this lifetime, but how about you keep me in mind if you want to work on a song together one day? I heard that one musical movie you were in. I like your voice.” Beca forces back her own blush at how absolutely nerdy that sounded.

Chloe’s smile is warmer. “One day. I like the sound of that.” She stares at Beca for a moment longer. “Well, I’m going to go finish my make-up, but I’ll see you in a bit!” Chloe giggles. “Also, I’ve never been to Disneyland before, so this is a treat.”

Chloe’s laugh still rings in Beca’s ear that it takes her a while to respond. “You’ve never been to Disneyland?”

Chloe’s voice echoes back to her as she walks backwards, still grinning radiantly at Beca. “There’s a first time for everything!”

Beca can only laugh disbelievingly. She’s still not quite sure what she did to be blessed with Chloe’s presence in her life.

 

* * *

 

 

**PEOPLE Magazine**

**_Chloe Beale and Beca Mitchell are FRIENDLY on the set of a new Music Video!_ **

_Shooting Mitchell’s new video last Friday, the two were seen hanging out during a lunch break at Disneyland to a lot of fanfare. They took photos with a few groups of fans before grabbing food to go. Eyewitness accounts say that the two were friendly, immersed in their own conversation._

_Beale is known for her starring role in Netflix’s The Boss, which recently picked up five Emmy Award nominations and two Golden Globe wins. Mitchell is working on her second album, working off the success of her first album. Her single “FRIENDS” is her latest release._

_The two were first seen together about six months ago during a Golden Globes after party._

_**See photos from Mitchell’s Disney-inspired music video set here!** _

 

* * *

 

 

 **Chloe**  
_So, we’re gonna do that again, right?_

 **Beca**  
_Do what? Disneyland?_

 **Chloe**  
_Yes, but this time, without the cameras. I want the full experience!_

 **Beca**  
_It’s a d-_

Beca bites her lip, quickly slamming the backspace key.

 **Beca**  
_you’re on, beale._

 

* * *

 

 

They do end up hanging out again, now that their schedules are a little less hectic. Chloe primarily films during the summer and beginning of fall more rigorously than she does the rest of the year. Beca isn’t really focused on much except the finishing the touches to her album.

They’re not...dates, per se, but they’re verging just beyond friendship. Beca enjoys spending time with Chloe, but she’s conscious of her publicist’s instructions that she keep everything tigh=tlipped and outside of the public eye, particularly since she’s still working on her own blossoming career.

All Beca hears is “stay in the closet” and it makes her hackles rise.

Still, she enjoys hanging out with Chloe - Chloe who has always lived a very public, carefree life, under the media microscope.

Chloe has become one of Beca’s closest friends, and with the speed at which Hollywood moves, Beca’s sure that Chloe is her best friend at this point. She finds herself texting her nonsensical things about fame, being a celebrity, and bounces song ideas off her. Similarly, Chloe texts her the latest updates about drama on set, her arguments with her director, and crazy fan encounters.

Above all, Beca thinks that it’s nice to share her life with somebody, even if it is in a friendship capacity. She tries not to let her mind wander too far.

Now, they’re sitting in a quiet corner at a cafe near Beca’s house. It’s a quiet Thursday afternoon, therefore there is less foot traffic.

Beca grumbles at small blind item on a gossip rag website that seems to be directed at her-slash-is about her.

She thinks that her sexuality isn’t too much of a secret, but she is careful to ensure that nothing ever really gets out because she’s still concerned with her own image as much as the next person.

It oddly feels like she’s in high school again, or even university. Where she was so concerned with what her own father thought about her choices and how she presented herself to her peers and community.

Becoming a famous musician was never really in her books, especially not with all the discouragement she received growing up, but she supposes stranger things have happened.

“You shouldn’t care so much about what people think,” Chloe murmurs, stirring her tea slowly. She watches Beca carefully.

“Not everybody can live like you,” Beca says before she can help herself. Chloe’s long history of dating flashes through her mind.

Chloe scoffs. “It’s just part of the job, sometimes. You know how it is. I just try to be as transparent as I can.” She looks concerned, then. “I’m just worried about you,” she says quietly. “You seem really...sad, sometimes and I don’t know how to help you.”

“You can’t help me,” Beca says quietly. “I don’t need help. I’m fine, like this. I can live a perfectly fulfilling life.”

Chloe pauses, like she’s afraid to spook Beca if she speaks too quickly. “Then...why haven’t you asked me out?”

“What makes you think...I would...ask you out?” she asks, stiltedly.

Chloe blinks, like she’s surprised at Beca’s reaction. Like she’s surprised that Beca would have had any other reaction than passive acquiescence.

Beca hates simultaneously how calm Chloe is  _and_ how right she is in assessing Beca’s attraction to her. She bristles under how easily Chloe can read her, even after such a short period of time. Some of her own friends and family still struggle to break down her walls.

“Do you want  _me_  to ask you out?” Chloe asks, after a long silence.

“No! I don’t...I can’t,” Beca mutters. She pushes her mug away, not feeling like drinking coffee anymore - not when her entire body is thrumming. “You know I can’t date you publicly,” she mumbles.

Chloe looks down, a brief sadness passing over her face as she contemplates Beca’s words. “I don’t mind keeping it a secret,” she says quietly. “For you, if that’s what you need.”

It occurs to her then that Chloe legitimately likes her for some reason that Beca can’t fathom.

Another thing that flashes through Beca’s mind is how terrible it would be to keep somebody as beautiful and precious as Chloe a secret.

Still, her mind flashes to all her work, down the drain, because she believes the world isn’t ready to see that on some level.

“I don’t date, you know I don’t,” Beca says, defenses rising.

“I don’t care about your history, Bec,” Chloe says patiently. “You know that.”

“Who said anything about my history?”

Chloe glances away. “I’m sorry, forget I said anything. I didn’t mean to bring it up.”

Beca’s not exactly sure that she can believe it was an accident, but she’s a master of leaving everything as buried under the surface as possible, whenever she can.

It’s how she’s always lived; it’s how she has always been told to live.

 

* * *

 

 **Chloe**  
_I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m really sorry._

 **Beca**  
_Yeah. I’m sorry for freaking out. That’s just how I am._

 **Chloe**  
_I’m not going to force you into something you’re not comfortable with. That would be wrong of me. I hope we can still be open with each other, though._

 **Chloe**  
_...still friends?_

Beca blinks. She can’t imagine  _not_ having Chloe in her life, after everything.

 **Beca**  
_yeah. Friends, Chlo. Always._

 

* * *

 

They don’t talk as frequently after that particular day, and they definitely don’t see each other in person again until the People’s Choice Awards in November.

Beca is attempting to follow her interviewer’s line of thought - some question about her album release date and potential tour - when she’s distracted by Chloe’s presence. Immediately, she hears the fans screaming for Chloe’s name and she wills herself not to turn, but she smells her, which only makes her groan at how big her stupid crush is.

“Hi!” Chloe says from behind her. “Beca,” she greets. Beca smiles at her interviewer before turning to greet Chloe with a kiss on the cheek or some other formal red-carpet greeting when she meets Chloe’s lips...with her own.

Her entire brain short circuits.

She is aware of two things.

First, that Chloe’s lips are impossibly soft and gentle and slightly parted, like she was going to live a slightly open-mouthed kiss on Beca’s cheek.

Second, that she responds almost instinctively and Chloe equally seems like she isn’t keen to immediately pull back.

Beca does, however. She jolts back and lets out a short laugh to cover up her shock.

Her publicist looks like she’s torn between looking shocked and furious.

There are cameras clicking all around them.

“Oh my God,” Chloe says immediately. She looks stricken and apologetic, before her face morphs and she’s immediately laughing it off, and tugging at Beca’s hand like they’ve been friends for years. “I can’t believe that happened!” she exclaims, turning towards the interviewer and camera to play it off. “I - I’ll see you inside, Bec.” She squeezes Beca’s hands once, in reassurance.

Beca exhales, trying to force a semi-believable smile on her face.

“So,” the interviewer begins. “You and Chloe are friends, huh?”

God, where does she even begin with  _that_.

 

* * *

 

Beca finds Chloe in the washroom during a commercial break. She had been keeping an eye out, meticulously (and as surreptitiously as possible) scanning the crowd and rows of audience members. She ignores the persistent buzzing of her phone, likely texts from Jennifer, pushing into the bathroom with shaking hands.

“Hey Beca,” Chloe says, catching sight of Beca through the mirror. Her casualness and friendliness throws Beca off. “Congrats on the nomination. I didn’t get to say so earlier.”

“You too,” Beca says distractedly. “Okay, we’re not going to talk about how you kissed me, then?” Beca asks, trying to keep her tone light.

Chloe laughs, drying her hands. “You mean how you kissed me? In public of all things.” She grins, a little wryly. “I thought you weren’t about airing your personal life in public?”

“Okay, first, you definitely kissed me,” Beca says, unsure why she’s making such a huge deal about all of this.

She feels odd, like something in her is clawing, trying desperately to get out.

Chloe sighs, turning softer eyes towards Beca. “It was an accident, Bec,” Chloe says gently, tilting her head. “I didn’t mean to startle you and you just happened to turn your head when I was going for your cheek. I’ll settle for a hand on your shoulder next time, I promise.” She puts her hand on the door, intent on pushing it open. “For the record though, you definitely kissed me back, but I’m willing to forget about it if you want.”

“Chloe, wait,” Beca starts, immediately feeling regret rush through her. “I’m sorry, I-”

She’s not sure where that sentence was intended to go. She’s not sure what’s going to happen in the next few moments.

She’s sure that she wants to kiss Chloe again.

Maybe it’s something in her eyes, but Chloe beats her to it - or maybe she read Beca’s mind. She cups Beca’s cheeks and presses their lips firmly together, like it’s the most natural thing in the world for them. Like it’s the culmination of this little dance they’ve been doing around each other for the past year.

Chloe smells vaguely of strawberries and her lips taste sweet, like peaches. Beca tilts her head, hands moving to Chloe’s waist, touching soft silk and bare skin. She feels like she’s kind of memorizing these little parts of Chloe, even if she’d like to deny herself the opportunity in the future.

Still, this is now and now, Beca’s focusing on the soft touch of Chloe’s lips against her and the gentle pressure Chloe exerts.

Beca isn’t sure when her eyes fell closed, but she’s just hoping that this isn’t some kind of fever dream because kissing Chloe is everything she imagined and more.

“Oops,” Chloe says softly, just as Beca’s eyes flutter open.

“Was that another accident?” Beca asks quietly, reaching her hands up to hold Chloe’s hands in place against her cheeks. She likes how secure she feels in Chloe’s presence.

“If you want it to be.”

Beca figures that accidents can happen in threes, as she leans up again.

 

* * *

 

**Entertainment Tonight**

**_Exclusive:_ ** _See this video of Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale kissing on the red carpet! The two stars accidentally lock lips at the People’s Choice Awards. They laughed it off as friends do, afterwards._

 


	2. heart attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca's not necessarily the biggest fan of Chloe's job, sometimes. Day 2: Jealousy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you come at me for writing more jealous!Beca, this is a Beca-centric fic.
> 
> Do not worry, jealous!Chloe will come in time, even if it’s not in this fic, though there's definitely still room. I only wrote an outline of this fic and each chapter is going come out day by day, soooo.
> 
> Happy day 2 of Bechloe week!

“Beca! Beca, look over here!”

Beca swivels, eyes trying to find some safe spot above the incessant flashing and jeers and nagging demands.

She turns her head when there’s a slight uptake in noise down the red carpet.

Chloe.

With a date on her arm.

 _Tall, Dark, and Handsome #10_ , Beca thinks scathingly.

Outwardly, she smiles, and lingers in her position as best as she can despite her publicist’s attempts to keep her moving.

“Beca,” she hisses. “Get a move on.”

“Give me a second, Jenn,” Beca says back, through clenched teeth.

She turns and Chloe is just a few feet in front of her, eyes already locked on Beca.

There’s a semi-playful smile on her lips even as she tugs her date into her side. She gives Beca a quick once-over - a glance that heats Beca up as quickly as it passes over her. Then, she’s turning back to the cameras like nothing ever happened.

Beca waits for it, then-

“Beca! Chloe! Will you take a photo together?”

“Us?” Chloe asks, a light laugh escaping her when the photographers nearly clamber over each other to get into a good shooting position. “I guess we’re friends,” she says lightly, though there’s challenge in her eyes that makes Beca’s competitive side rise.

“Sure,” Beca chirps. She can hear Jennifer growling already. She reaches for Chloe at the same time Chloe’s hand reaches out and their fingertips brush. Beca tries not to think about how Chloe has a date, ignoring him in favour of sliding a hand around Chloe’s waist. She ensures that she brushes over whatever available skin she can reach.

The moment Chloe’s hand and arm lock into place behind Beca’s back, she thinks the cameras nearly blind her at how fast flashes and shutters are clicking and going off.

“A date?” she mutters, keeping her eyes forward. “Who is he?”

There's a part of Beca that almost wishes she had taken up her publicist and manager's suggestion that she date people here and there, even if they'd primarily function as beards, if anything. Still, she can't imagine forcing herself to even act like she enjoys a stranger's company, which is where her and Chloe differ, she supposes.

They had also agreed that both of them dating would be excessive. It'd just have to be one of them - enough to throw off any suspicion.

(Beca's publicist's words, not hers.)

“ _Somebody_ didn’t want to come with me. Even as friends.” Chloe’s tone is still somehow light and cheerful, through her own clenched teeth.

“ _Somebody_ thought that _somebody else_ wasn’t going to come after all,” Beca murmurs, shifting ever so slightly closer to Chloe.

There’s a gentle brush of fingertips against the nape of her neck before Chloe’s hand comes to her shoulder, holding tight while she leans in further into Beca’s side. “Somebody thought wrong,” she murmurs, tilting her head ever so slightly. 

At that moment, Chloe makes as if she’s about to pull away. Beca does the same, dropping her arm.

However, Chloe’s hand comes up to catch her hand. “You look beautiful,” she says quietly.

The sound of shutters clicking nearly drowns it out, but Beca hears it loud and clear.

She can’t bring herself to say it back. Not aloud at least.

Not in public.

 

 

 

* * *

 

_“We can’t do this,” Beca says softly. “I can’t do this to you.”_

_“Do what to me?” Chloe asks, removing her hands from Beca’s grasp. Her eyes flick to Beca’s lips, tenderness passing through them. She gently thumbs at Beca’s lipstick, wiping away a smudge. “I’m a big girl,” she murmurs._

_“I can’t date you, you know that.” Beca squeezes her eyes shut. “But I also can’t just...kiss you in bathrooms and hide you away from the rest of the world.”_

_Chloe’s eyes roam over her, assessing her, piercing through her. Beca feels bare and vulnerable._

_“I wish I could be strong enough,” Beca says helplessly._

_“It’s not about strength,” Chloe says, finally stepping forward to cup Beca’s cheek. “It’s about what you feel is right for you. I think you’re one of the strongest people I know.”_

_Interestingly, what feels most right - especially at this moment - is this little quiet, secluded moment. Away from prying ears or eyes._

_“This feels right,” Beca whispers, chest tightening at the admission. Chloe’s eyes light up._

_“Let’s give it a shot?”_

_Chloe is hopeful and happy and she looks nervous, which is a first._

_Beca can’t help but kiss her again._  

 

 

 

* * *

 

That had been about one and a half months ago.

So, they’re not dating necessarily - not in public. Which is surprisingly fine to Chloe. It surprises Beca - and disappoints her a little - that Chloe is so easily on board. She supposes that they’re “exclusive” or “going steady” since “dating” would mean that they publicly go out on dates or something. Beca’s not too sure.

There’s a part of her that itches to be public with her relationship with Chloe because it’s the most refreshed she has felt in a long while.

Beca chews her nail nervously, flipping through tabloid after tabloid of Chloe with her latest co-star - some actor she’s starring alongside in an upcoming movie.

Beca isn’t quite sure she likes actors (though Chloe might be the only exception to that). She hates how she can never tell when they’re really acting - at least, the decent ones, of course.

It makes Beca kind of nauseous, actually, seeing the way Chloe’s hand curls into her co-star’s arm. Beca’s not even sure she remembers his name - Daniel something or another - because she honestly doesn’t see him.

All she sees is Chloe and she’s still coming to terms with that - whatever that means. All she can think about is how Chloe had felt in her arms - how it felt to kiss her.

Like the feeling of sunshine on her face after emerging from a dark, cold, and lonely cave.

She doesn’t want to go back.

She supposes, as Chloe’s arms wrap around from behind, gentle lips skirting lazily across her cheek, that she doesn’t really have to go back. She gets her own little slice of sunlight everyday, even if they’ve been meticulously keeping their relationship under wraps for the past little while. The way their projects have been ramping out however, it makes Beca nervous for whatever is in store for them for the future because she selfishly doesn’t want to give this up quite yet.

“Hi,” she greets, reaching for Chloe’s hand to tangle their fingers together. She tugs Chloe’s arm further over her shoulder. Chloe’s free hand roams mischievously under the collar of her shirt, gently scraping her nails against Beca’s suddenly hot and flushed skin. “What are you doing?” she mumbles, tilting her head to give Chloe better access to her cheek and neck.

Chloe pauses, eyes catching on Beca’s reading material. “What are you doing, babe?” Chloe says, voice still a little thick from sleep. “Gossip rags?”

“When were you going to tell me you were dating somebody else?” Beca asks lightly.

Chloe laughs it off, momentarily distracting Beca. She turns to meet Chloe’s lips in a kiss.

This can wait, she supposes.

 

 

 

* * *

 

**InStyle Magazine**

**_Chloe Beale and Daniel Harrison step out in matching outfits!_ **

_The two were seen enjoying a coffee break in downtown Los Angeles after filming a scene for their latest film “A Gift” set to be released in the summer of next year._   

 

 

* * *

 

The days away from Chloe are some of hardest.

Chloe is filming in Los Angeles while Beca works on her album in New York with a new, popular producer.

Her rental apartment feels less homely than she’d like. There’s a part of her that kind of misses touring. She had  _loved_ her first tour - the rush and thrill, before retiring to her tour bus or hotel room, alone, but still thrumming on adrenaline.

It’s just - Beca kind of misses Chloe and wishes her obligations didn’t drive her so far from Los Angeles.

She wonders vaguely if her manager had planned it this way - to push her across the country from Chloe. To separate them and force some pressure on their young and fragile relationship.

It’s mocking, almost, the distance. Like Beca  _could_ fix this if she so desired. Everything.

In her mind, Chloe reminds her that nothing’s broken.

Her answering machine beeps.

"Oh. Hi there, Bec! It's me."

Beca feels familiar warmth at the sound of Chloe's voice. She lets it wash over her, opting to just recline on the couch and gaze up at the ceiling.

She resists picking up because she’s still a little hurt that Chloe wouldn’t tell her about this fake-dating publicity stunt.

She picks up her bottle of beer again, waiting for the message to continue.

“Hello? Are you there? Well…I’m just leaving a message for you because I wanted to see how you were doing. I know it’s a bit late there now, but I just missed you and I wanted to hear your voice.” Chloe pauses, then, shyly says, “Among other things.” Beca blushes. “I guess you’re busy with work,” Chloe says lightly. “I read something the other day about how you were working on a collaboration! Congrats!” There’s static and interference.

Beca waits.

“Oh, hey, sorry I have to go. Talk to you soon, maybe?”

Beca downs the rest of her beer.

 

 

* * *

  

 

 

**TMZ.com**

**_Chloe Beale and Daniel Harrison heat up their romance! See photos from the date night at Casa Vega!_ **

_The two held hands and exited the establishment together! Seems like romance is brewing on and off screen and we’re here to provide all the photos._

_Insiders tell us that the two are very happy together._

**RELATED LINK:** _See photos of BFFs Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale on the Vanity Fair Benefit Red Carpet._

 

 

* * *

 

**Beca**  
_When were you going to tell me you have a new boyfriend? Or was an insider supposed to get that information to me as well._

 **Beca**  
_I’m sorry...I don’t know where that came from._

 **Chloe**  
_If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re jealous. ;)_

 **Beca**  
_…_

 **Chloe**  
_Meet me for coffee? Now that you’re back?_

 **Beca**  
_can’t, i have work._

 

 

* * *

 

Beca does have work, but she can’t bring herself to concentrate. She feels like she needs to convey everything building up inside her or she might very literally burst.

Chloe comes around to Beca’s house.

“Are we in a fight?” she asks the moment Beca opens the door.

Beca can only shake her head no because she’s so happy to see Chloe in person again.

(It’s something she does - she punishes herself and denies herself any happiness because she thinks it’s what she deserves.)

She pulls Chloe in and meets her for a bruising kiss.

 

 

* * *

 

“But why didn’t you tell me?” Beca asks, finger stroking up Chloe’s arm.

“Well, I wasn’t sure at first, if it was what the producers wanted to do. Then when it finally happened, like officially, it was too late and every news outlet picked up on it. I wanted to tell you in person, I really did. But you know that I’m only coming home to you,” Chloe says, pushing at Beca’s arm so she’s hovering over her again. She leans down to nip at Beca’s lip.

“I don’t like the way he touches you,” Beca murmurs, trying to get it out between kisses.

Chloe sighs, sitting up straight, astride Beca’s thighs. “I don’t like the way some of your fans hang all over you, but you don’t hear me complaining, do you?” Beca stifles a smile. She has heard Chloe complain many times.

“It’s part of the job,” Beca says without thinking. She groans when Chloe’s eyes light up.

Chloe grins triumphantly, doing a little fist pump. “Ditto,” she says, dodging Beca’s hands as she tries to grab at her arms. She leaps out of bed, laughing a little when Beca makes a grab for her again, missing dramatically.

It warms Beca knowing that this is a side of Chloe only she gets to see.

Later, Chloe is fiddling nervously with her phone as she wanders into Beca’s study where she’s working on a new song.

“What’s wrong?” Beca asks instantly when she catches sight of Chloe’s hesitance. “Is it what’s-his-face?”

Chloe doesn’t bother correcting her, which is both concerning and amusing. Instead, she shakes her head. “I have an idea, which I just brought up to Aubrey and she said it was a great idea.”

Beca holds back a comment and waits for Chloe to continue.

“Well, what if you...hung out with me and Daniel on a few of our...outings.” Beca hates it when Chloe uses the word ‘dates’ especially since their own dates are consistently fraught with sneaky handholds and hidden kisses.

“Hang out,” Beca repeats. “Like a third wheel.”

“Yeah,” Chloe says. “But...please don’t say it like that. I miss you and I feel like we don’t get to go out as often while I’m working on this movie. It’s just for a a month or so more, just up until we do post-production.”

"Yeah, and then there'll be a press tour," Beca says grumpily.

Chloe bites her lip, nodding.

It’s completely insane but Beca has learned that there are no limits for studios and producers when there’s money involved.

“Can’t get out of that part of the contract?” she guesses, and judging by the look on Chloe’s face, she’s right.

“We could run it by Jennifer. Aubrey thinks it should be fine. Besides, it has to look like you semi-approve of him, I guess, since we’re best friends and all,” she says, nudging Beca.

“Oh, well if Aubrey thinks it’s a great idea, it must be,” Beca says before she can help herself. She’s still bristling from the first time she met Chloe’s ruthless manager.

“Beca,” Chloe says. She grins, settling herself on Beca’s lap comfortably. “It’s a lot to ask, I know. But I’m just a girl, standing in front of my girlfriend, asking her if she’ll go on a date with me and my fake boyfriend.”

“Okay, you hear how ridiculous that sounds, right?” Beca asks, without any real bite. She reminds herself that secrecy is part of her own brand; her own insecurities. She had suggested secrecy above all, so long as it gave her a chance at Chloe Beale.

And Chloe has accommodated her all this while, even finding ways to include her in her ridiculous schemes and fake whirlwind romances.

“Try it once,” Chloe says, tangling her hands in Beca’s hair.

Beca hates how weak she is.

 

 

 

* * *

 

**Beca**  
_We’re doing the date thing, i guess_

 **Jennifer**  
_Yes, i got the heads up from Aubrey Posen. That woman is insane._

 **Jennifer**  
_Remember - your image_

Beca sighs. 

 

 

* * *

 

She tries – she really does.

Their first outing together is a near disaster. Beca can’t bring herself to do anything with her face except grimace. She tries to smile, but all she sees is the way Daniel’s disproportionately long arm is slung around Chloe’s shoulders, like he has a right to do that. Beca wants to put her normally-sized arm around Chloe’s shoulders in public.

The worst part is, this first outing is going to the fucking movies.

Beca hates movies and she especially hates theaters.

Still, the paparazzi get their shots as they enter the theater, which is enough. Beca watches with satisfaction as Chloe shrugs his arm off and stands closer to Beca, smiling at her comfortingly.

“What are we watching?” Beca asks begrudgingly.

In the end, she supposes it doesn’t matter because Chloe’s fingers tangle with hers in the comfort of the dark theater.

All Beca can think is that sunlight should never be smothered, holding hands with her favourite person.

 

 

* * *

  

 

Beca thinks she should be used to it by now - watching Chloe fake-date this ever-cheerful man. It takes a turn for the worst when she realizes that Chloe considers him a friend and that they might actually be obliged to hang out with him once Chloe is done with this movie.

The thought sends a shudder through Beca because they hang out with him enough already. She doesn’t know what would happen if they had to go to his house for dinner.

Well, she does know, kind of, because they’re invited to his home for a dinner party. She hates his matching cutlery and fancy dishware.

What she hates most is his music taste. She scoffs at everything on his shelf, taking pride in the fact that Chloe has once complained about his ridiculous fixation on country music. Beca would never do that to her girlfriend.

“So, you and Chloe are pretty serious, huh?” he asks, pouring Beca more wine. “What has it been? Three months already?”

Beca glances around. She’s still not used to talking about her relationship publicly, but she supposes Daniel should know just one reason amidst many as to why Chloe won’t date him for real.

“Yes,” is all she offers him. “Thanks for the wine.” She pauses. “And it’s been four months, thank you very much.”

She bites back the childish, it’s more than your zero, because you have no shot.

She hates him. 

 

 

 

* * *

 

Beca feels both vindicated and disgusted when her hate is validated.

They’re on a ‘date’ at a coffee shop when Daniel tries to kiss Chloe mid sentence. He misses because Chloe turns her cheek in time, but the intent is there. Beca nearly drops her cup and Chloe looks like she’s torn between slapping him right on the spot or punching him in the face.

Consciously, Beca knows both would be bad for Chloe’s image, so she puts a hand on Chloe’s arm, soothing her, even though she knows she would love to be privy to that particular scene. Especially now.

Chloe, through clenched teeth, says “let’s call a car. I would like to go home now.”

They wait outside the restaurant, eyes facing forward. Beca feels rage build up inside her and she quickly stuffs her hands into her jacket pockets so paparazzi can’t catch the way her hands are balled into tight fists. She doesn’t want to see the news items splashed across the front page.

“What the hell was that?” Chloe demands, tugging her hand out of his grasp once they’re safely nestled in the car. Daniel wisely sits in the front, letting Chloe and Beca sit together in the back. “If you ever try to kiss me again, let alone in front of my girlfriend, I’m going to punch you straight in the mouth,” she says, taking the words right out from under Beca.

“Sorry, I got a little -” he gestures between them. “You two were just off in your own little world. I was…”

“Okay, but we’re not dating, so you don’t have any right to be jealous,” Chloe says and it’s so acidic and sharp that Beca has to do a double take and ensure that she’s still talking to Chloe Beale.

It fades as quickly as it comes however, because Chloe is sagging a little, her posture and stance loosening. She shakes her head as if to clear it.

“Of course I’m jealous,” Daniel says incredulously. “You’re - you,” he states, a little weakly, as if that’s enough to explain everything.

Beca completely understands.

Chloe is beautiful and charming and she never fails to shine no matter what room she’s in. Beca finds herself a little jealous of Chloe herself sometimes, with the ease with which she carries herself. Chloe has never cowered from the spotlight in any way, taking on indie roles and pay cuts when necessary in order to push forward a project she truly believed in.

Still, “that’s really inappropriate, considering I was right there,” Beca says, a little - okay, a lot - angrily.

He looks appropriately chastened, which surprises Beca because she had been expecting more of a fight. She appreciates him backing down, but she still hates him with every fiber in her being. It’s not like he and Chloe have ever kissed publicly before. Beca knows this.

She shifts closer to Chloe as best as she can on the leather seat, eyes narrowed on him. Before she can say anything, Chloe beats her to the punch - though unfortunately, not literally.

“Don’t even think about telling anybody as some weird form of revenge,” Chloe says softly, though her voice is dangerous. Beca shivers at the fire in her eyes. “Or I’ll tell everybody what you’re really like. I don’t think your career could deal with a devastating blow to it at this point.”

It’s the closest to condescending that Beca has ever heard from Chloe Beale.

She loves it.

(She loves her.)  

 

* * *

   

**TMZ.com**

**_BFFs Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale on the rocks?_ **

_The two starlets were seen out with Beale’s boyfriend, Daniel Harrison. This is not an uncommon occurrence, but we here at TMZ have noticed a trend. Mitchell never looks particularly happy and insiders tell us it’s because she wants Harrison for herself!_

_Insiders tell us that Mitchell is jealous of Beale and how easily she found love._

_Well. If looks could kill._

_Can their friendship survive or is there something more brewing under the surface?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, hmu on [tumblr](http://isthemusictoblame.tumblr.com/)! thanks for reading. :)


	3. out of the woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Wasn’t there a study about the relationship between alcohol and honesty? 
> 
> day 3: drunk texting.

Beca’s fear of public scrutiny stems from the long-held belief that she needs to carry herself a certain way in order to get ahead – particularly since her own father had been less than supportive of her career decisions, believing that the entertainment industry would chew her up and spit her right back up. It’s a gut-wrenching feeling of impending embarrassment – that one day it’ll all come crashing down on her.

Is she being smart enough? Witty enough? Would she be able to drum up a perfect comeback to an interviewer’s gentle ribbing? Can she convey the right balance of intelligence and good-natured flirtiness?

And the truth – God, how would she get around telling the truth in its most base form?

How would she answer a question authentically and honestly if she can’t say everything that she wants?

There are truthful answers to specific questions that have the possibility of killing her career in a moment -  or so she has been conditioned to believe.

And now – maybe Chloe’s career as well.

For all intents and purposes, Chloe has never been forced in and out of any particular closets. Beca notes that Chloe has been linked to a small number of male co-stars over the course of her career, while also maintaining a close female friendship from time to time.

That’s how it is portrayed in the news. Beca realizes this is not the truth, however, because Chloe has told her, outright, exactly what a few of those female friendships entailed.

Being a relatively high-profile actress, especially one that is so up-and-coming, Beca realizes that Chloe likely has some reservations about her own perceived sexuality, but it just happens to be that Chloe’s persona allows her more leeway – or rather, more room – for a kind of enforced belief that she is only attracted to men.

Beca wonders how different Chloe’s career would be if she outright stated they were dating – how different would Chloe’s jobs be? What would Chloe talk about in interviews?

The same questions apply to herself.

She allows herself a brief reprieve, wondering if it’d be all worth it, when she thinks, bluntly, of course it would be. She thinks about holding hands with Chloe publicly and enthusiastically gushing about her girlfriend’s successes.

(In her mind, she already sees the headlines, however, wondering how much it would take for the transition from “gal pals” to “girlfriends” in the eyes of the media.)

Still, as of right now her own career is the focal point for today’s press tour. New album, new Disney project, new things on the horizon. She takes a breath, ready to talk about her latest project as she turns to face the audience.

 

 

* * *

 

“I watched the interview at lunch today. You looked beautiful,” Chloe tells her over the phone. “I like it when you tie up your hair in a ponytail.”

The easy way Chloe delivers compliments still makes Beca blush like a teenager.

“I didn’t seem nervous or anything, did I?”

 

“Bec, you’re a pro at this. You’ve never seemed nervous, I promise. As an expert on all things you, I can say, completely objectively, that you killed it.”

“Thank you,” she murmurs. She tucks her free hand into her pocket, waiting for her coffee. “How’s Atlanta?” Beca asks.

“Good. A little hot.” Chloe exhales. “Okay, very hot. Like, it’s still the beginning of June. What gives?”

“I want to come out,” Beca blurts, instead of responding to Chloe’s casual conversation.

Chloe pauses and all Beca can hear then is the sound of her own breathing.

“I...wait, I d-don’t know,” she stutters out, blinking back the sudden onslaught of tears.

“Beca,” Chloe says gently. “Bec, is this what you want?”

“I don’t know. Like...maybe? I was thinking about it - it’s all I’ve been thinking about for the past few months and honestly, I don’t want to have to wait for the next time you have to fake-date one of your co-stars.” Beca’s brow furrows. “That’s - that’s not why I would want to come out though. Like, I honestly…” she exhales, stopping short of just blurting out that she loves Chloe.

They’ve been dating seriously for about seven months now and Beca can’t imagine not being in love with Chloe. She’s about ninety percent sure Chloe feels the same way, but there’s a constant hesitance nagging at her, like an unavoidable pain in her ass.

She just wants it to be perfect, but it’s kind of difficult to find time when they’re working constantly.

“You honestly…?”

“I just want...to be able to go out with you. And hang out without worrying. And have people tell us we look cute together. I don’t know,” Beca says quickly. “That was dumb.”

Chloe laughs a little at that. “People do think we look cute together. There’s a whole community dedicated to that.”

“Not like that," Beca stresses, trying not to think about what it had been like when they first stumbled across that. "I mean...I guess I just want this to be a part of who I am, publicly.”

“It’ll be stressful,” Chloe says softly.

“I know,” Beca replies slowly. “I know it will be.”

“But,” Chloe continues. “I will always be here for you, no matter what happens.” Then, without an ounce of fear or hesitance. “When and how did you want to do this?”

Beca exhales, letting out a short laugh. It feels like her chest can finally expand freely again. “I...I don’t know. It’s just something I wanted to tell you. Something that I want to do...eventually.”

Chloe hums and Beca can practically see the smile on her face. “Then I guess I’ll be there with you every step of the way. You’re stuck with me.”

 

* * *

 

**_Entertainment Tonight_ **

**Beca Mitchell is slated to star in Walt Disney Pictures’ upcoming animated movie!**

_During a segment on Late Night with Seth Meyers, the pop star sat down to detail Disney’s latest production, The Armadillos, an upcoming animated movie. Along with voice-acting duties, Mitchell revealed she has been working on original music for the film. Mitchell will be working alongside Mark Mancina, who will focus primarily on the score._

_“I really wanted to talk about it when it was still under wraps, but now that it’s out...I’m really excited to try my hand at more songwriting and composing. Oh, and voice acting. That’s new.”_

_Mitchell’s second album was released back in April and she has been gearing up for a North American tour beginning in August._

_**Related:**  Happy 28th birthday to Chloe Beale! See photos from her star-studded party._

 

* * *

 

Beca is exhausted.

She collapses on her couch after the club, wondering why she bothers allowing Amy to take her out anymore, especially when she feels like she’s already too old to participate in excessive drinking.

She’s not sure what compels her to do it, but she finds herself in a hole of watching old interviews of herself. They’re only a couple years old, but Beca can’t believe how much has changed since then. She marvels at how much better she feels about herself now compared to then.

Still pleasantly buzzed, she forces herself up to grab a beer and a quick snack from the fridge before wandering into the study.

The changes to her personal life have been magnificent as well, she muses, thinking primarily of how much she misses Chloe.

Drinking alone isn’t as fun as it used to be.

Then again, she vaguely thinks that she could just message Chloe and talk to her because they’re dating. Beca is dating Chloe. Chloe is dating Beca.

It’s a nice, pleasant thought.

So pleasant that she briefly wonders why it’s a secret. Why does she have to compartmentalize and store away the experience of dating Chloe Beale? Why should she have to hide?

It’s crazy, but simultaneously liberating, the thought that she could just...let it go.

She sighs, switching gears.

She shouldn’t do this - she knows - but it’s so tempting and there, all across the internet.

She searches her own name.

 

> _**Beca Mitchell’s latest single hits #1! See the music video here.** _
> 
> _**Beca Mitchell spotted hanging out in Beverly Hills with BFF Chloe Beale** _
> 
> _**Beca Mitchell: Pop star and music producer extraordinaire - her latest projects!** _
> 
> _**Beca Mitchell, still pining after Daniel Harrison after his split with co-star Chloe Beale.** _

Beca blinks, doing a double-take. She had thought all of that was lain to rest, especially since she made it a point to never see him again after his and Chloe’s staged break-up. That feels like two lifetimes ago, since Chloe refused to see him as well.

Beca’s sure their movie will still do well - she has more than enough faith in Chloe’s talents.

(She had also selfishly breathed a sigh of relief when Chloe told her she was done with that.)

Getting up, she paces, wishing she could call Chloe, but their time difference means that Chloe is probably asleep.

Blearily, she thinks that she could tweet about it - that way Chloe will have something to read when she gets up.

Besides, _Jenn_ is always telling her to tweet a bit more. 

> **becamitchell:** Lol

She fires it off without thinking about it, finally feeling some sense of cathartic release at the simple act of pure agency.

> **becamitchell:** i honestly can’t believe people would rather see me with a dude than just open their eyes....wild.  
>  **becamitchell:** I can’t wait to just be free - free as a BIRD. birb.  
>  **becamitchell:** i love her eyes. There, i said it.  
>  **becamitchell:** i’m sorry i was so afraid of what people would think...you deserve better

At this point, Beca’s not sure who she’s even talking to anymore. Herself, her fans, Chloe - they all blend together in her mind. She nods, getting more comfortable on her couch. Ignoring the increasing number of notifications she’s getting, she powers through.

 

> **becamitchell:** i!!! Love!!! you!!! So much!!! What’d i do to deserve you, honestly.

She throws in a few tweets with gifs for good measure.

Satisfied, she finally falls into a dreamless sleep.

It feels like the most rest she has gotten in a very long time.

 

* * *

 

When Beca wakes up, it’s to a cacophony of sound. She thinks her home phone is ringing, but so is her cell phone.

Incessantly.

Groaning, she nearly smacks her phone away in an effort to silence it. Its buzzing is more bearable, but still ridiculously annoying.

She feels the beginnings of a nasty hangover and struggles to push herself into a sitting position. She groans when her room spins immediately.

Grabbing her phone, she makes her way to the bathroom, hoping to get some of the dryness out of her mouth and maybe feel a bit less like a piece of shit.

She hates hangovers and the buzzing in her hand still isn’t helping.

Once she manages to unlock her phone, she peers at her notifications with bleary eyes.

Then, she drops her toothbrush with a clatter into her sink.

“Oh, fuck,” she whimpers, hastily scrolling through all the replies on her Twitter notifications. On the main feed, she already sees headlines being retweeted onto her timeline.

She vaguely remembers tweeting, but it had felt so...right at the time. Now, all she feels is a nasty pull in her stomach as she continues scrolling through replies. They look positive on the surface, but she doesn’t have to scroll far before reaching something that spikes both ire and panic.

A text from Chloe - among many - comes in.

 

> **Chloe**  
>  _bec, you’re scaring me. please call me._

With shaking hands, she swipes into their conversation, scrolling through the messages she has received thus far from Chloe. She has many missed texts from Chloe - and a series of other people as well.

 

> **Chloe**  
>  _I just woke up and saw what you did last night_
> 
> **Chloe**  
>  _Are you okay? What happened?_
> 
> **Chloe**  
>  _You’re probably still asleep, but when you wake up, please call me._
> 
> **Chloe**  
>  _Beca Mitchell, call me!! I’m literally ignoring phone calls left, right, and center right now._
> 
> **Chloe  
>  ** _I’m so worried about you. I promise that I’m not mad at all. I just want to know that you’re okay._

She barely manages to rinse the toothpaste out of her mouth before she’s dashing back into the study. She’s sure the nausea she’s feeling is less about the alcohol at this point.

Beca pulls her laptop out of its case and quickly clicks into her emails, seeing requests for interviews and a message from her father.

That in particular makes her take pause; it makes her reel back because she can’t imagine what he’ll have to say about everything, after she stormed out of his house the last time they spoke.

At the corner of her screen, a message notification comes in.

 

> **Jennifer**  
>  _You know what happened, right?_

Beca replies to _that_.

 

> **Beca  
>  ** _fuck off for a moment will you_

She slams her laptop shut, pushing it away along with her phone.

She figures that none of this needs to be dealt with right away. The damage is done. Complete. She just has to wait it out.

She just wants one quiet moment before the rest of her life explodes around her.

 

* * *

 

 

When she comes to, it’s to the feeling of a gentle touch to her cheek. She startles, eyes flying open, but her body immediately relaxes when she sees Chloe hovering over her, an immensely upset expression on her face.

“You scared the _shit_ out of me,” Chloe says in a low, dangerous voice. “Do you know what was going through my _fucking_ mind?”

Beca swallows, sitting up slowly. She feels groggy and nowhere near well-rested. When she catches sight of the time, she realizes she had knocked out for another few hours.

“How...how are you here?” Beca asks, rubbing the side of her face where she feels a little bit of disgusting dried drool.

“I flew here,” Chloe says, still looking supremely unhappy.

“From Atlanta?”

Chloe arches an eyebrow, arms crossing. “Yes, obviously.”

“Why?” Beca asks quietly.

Chloe’s entire stance softens and she sinks onto the couch next to Beca. Tears well up in her eyes. “I had to. I didn’t know what the hell happened to you. You weren’t responding to anything I sent you. Aubrey said Jenn hadn’t said anything to her. Nobody knew anything. I was terrified,” she says, voice coming out on a light whimper. “I thought something...I thought something had happened.”

Beca swallows, eyes squeezing shut. It’s not quite a headache, but she feels immense pressure in her head. “Nothing happened. I’m fine,” she says softly.

“Yes, but what _if_!” Chloe exclaims. She looks like she kind of wants to punch Beca, and honestly Beca feels like she could use a good punch in the face right about now. “You...mean a lot to me,” Chloe says, losing steam quickly. She reaches out for Beca’s hand and that’s enough for Beca to collapse into her, tears coming out in full force.

“I’m scared,” Beca mumbles, tucking her hands under Chloe’s shirt as best as she can. She just needs to feel Chloe’s warmth somehow. A sob escapes her and before she knows it, she’s practically in Chloe’s lap, hugging her with everything in her, like she’s afraid she’ll disappear.

In her experience, people disappear when hard times come about. It’s just a fact of her life.

“I’m here,” Chloe whispers, holding Beca as best as she can. There’s a brokenness to her tone, but her touch is protective and sure.

“Please don’t be mad,” Beca manages to choke out.

“I’m not mad, I promise. I’m here,” she repeats. “We’ll get through this together.

 

* * *

 

Beca feels significantly calmer about fifteen minutes later. She lets Chloe coax her onto her back, resting her head on Chloe’s lap. Chloe casually clicks on her TV and quickly switches to cartoons - probably to avoid seeing a news segment that’ll only further upset both of them.

“How’s your phone doing?” Beca rasps, voice hoarse from crying.

“Silenced,” Chloe says nonchalantly.

A thought occurs to Beca. “Aren’t you supposed to be filming right now?”

“I...said there was a family emergency,” Chloe says after a sharp inhale.

“Bet Aubrey loved that,” Beca mutters. “The lying.”

Chloe’s fingers gently stroke up her neck and into her hair. “I...wasn’t lying,” she says, so quietly that Beca almost misses it.

Beca swallows thickly, eyes fluttering shut at both the warmth in her chest and the way Chloe expertly kneads her fingers into her skin.

Then the self-deprecation comes back in full force. She squeezes her eyes shut, trying to imagine what it would have been like if she had just...gone to bed or something. If she hadn’t gone out. If she hadn’t picked up that nightcap.

God. How did this happen?

“Beca?” Chloe asks, combing her fingers through her hair soothingly. “Did you mean what you said?”

Beca stifles a sob. “Did I mean what? I said a lot of things, Chloe.”

Chloe is quiet for a moment, though her fingers don’t stop carding through Beca’s hair, gently applying pressure to her scalp. “That you love me,” she says softly, like she’s afraid Beca will dart right off the couch.

Beca takes time to contemplate that, closing her eyes. Chloe’s other hand glides down her arm to gently touch at her wrist.

“Bec?”

“I do love you,” Beca murmurs. “You make me want to...I don’t know...be the best version of myself. You’ve never tried to force me into doing something I wasn’t ready for. You make me want to be better. Does that make sense?”

Chloe nods, eyes locking onto Beca’s.

“I love you. I love you, too,” Chloe whispers, and it’s so tender and honest that Beca can’t help but cry again. She sits up slowly, only so she can cup Chloe’s cheeks and pull her in for a kiss.

It’s not earth-shattering or particularly passionate, just a reminder of the tenderness and love that passes through them with ease - especially now that there are words for the sensation.

“I love you,” Beca repeats, words sticking somewhere in her throat as she continues pressing kisses to Chloe’s lips. “I love you, I love you-”

Chloe shushes her, hand coming up to cup Beca’s cheek. “You’ve done enough rambling, don’t you think?”

Beca laughs, a little watery. “Shut up.”

 

* * *

 

 

> **becamitchell:** _in other words...did you know that happy tears are a thing?_


	4. white noise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's no way to block out all the sound, especially after the fallout.
> 
> day 4: why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Highly recommend listening to "White Noise" by Ella Vos. 
> 
> Sorry for the late posting!

Beca has never felt more put on the spot.

“Why did you decide to come out?”

Beca’s not really sure if she can’t answer that articulately.

First, flat-out, she had refused to retract anything or chalk it up to hacking like Jenn had suggested.

Now, she’s not sure there’s an answer that goes beyond “I’m in love with this incredible woman and it was killing me that I couldn’t do anything about it.”

She’s not sure there’s an answer that goes beyond _“I’m in love with this incredible woman and it was killing me that I couldn’t do anything about it.”_

Her actual response is a wry smile and a shrug of her shoulders. She’s kind of glad that this is an interview for a publication as opposed to an interview that’s televised, but she’s sure that those will come in as quickly as she can blink once this comes out.

Her interviewer, a friendly-enough woman by the name of Grace, waits patiently across from her.

Beca feels like her face is growing hot because despite the general seclusion they have from the other patrons, she feels like a million eyes are on her back.

Though - metaphorically, she supposes there is a rather large spotlight on her back at the moment.

Or a target.

It feels like all she has to do is say one wrong sentence and her entire career is over. Down the drain.

But, there’s strength that she can draw from how she had woken up that morning to the feeling of Chloe’s arms wrapped around her. Beca is afraid to ask how long Chloe will put off heading back to Atlanta because she wants this bubble to remain intact, if not for a little while longer.

Beca’s not quite sure what the protocol is, when her entire life has been turned inside out. Should she smile and pretend everything is okay? Should she retreat and apologize?

“Beca?” Grace asks curiously. There’s a gentleness to her that Beca finds soothing. The questions have been, for all intents and purposes, fairly tame so far. She trips on the “why” however because of it immediately makes her think of _everything_ and nothing all at once. “We can...scrap that if you want. If you don’t want to answer “why”. Maybe that wasn’t...phrased in the best way. I know it’s kind of hard because your reasons must be far and wide.”

Beca finds herself nodding along.

“It’s so difficult to simplify something like this down to a few sentences.”

It makes Beca want to _try_ , however. She has never really had it lain out so plainly for her before. It’s not that she necessarily owes anybody anything; her own introspection is such a painful process for _her_ , let alone what it must be like to draw that out for the world to read and consume.

“No, I just...I’m thinking,” she murmurs. “I don’t want to just say _anything_ , you know?” She blushes. “Sorry, I’m ruining this interview.” She shakes her head.

“Okay, let’s move on. Is there anything you regret right now?”

Beca blows out a breath. She gathers warmth from the coffee mug in front of her, drumming her fingers on the ceramic anxiously. “I think...I don’t regret that it’s out there. No,” she says more confidently. “Definitely not. I just regret how I did it, a little bit?” she says, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe no more late night tweets for me.”

Grace laughs. “Off the record?” Beca nods. “I totally knew you and Chloe Beale were a thing. Anybody with eyes could see it. It’s just what people are ready to see, I guess.” She softens at Beca’s surprised expression. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to write her into this. I just...wanted you to know that I’m happy for you. Everybody deserves to be happy, Beca.”

 

* * *

 

“How long have you been gay, Beca? Or would you prefer lesbian? Is this why you haven’t dated anybody seriously since moving to Los Angeles?”

Beca blinks.

"Sorry, repeat the, er, questions?

* * *

 

Not all reactions are equally positive. Beca does her best to ignore the way her notifications are consistently blowing up, no matter what she does. She tries to ignore it, she really does, but sometimes she slips when she has nothing else on her mind.

Interestingly, some of the more jarring reactions are actually the seemingly innocent ones, like the many “why is she gay now?” tweets and their variations that pop-up across her feed.

It makes her shrivel up a little because she can only think about how painful it had been to acknowledge this for herself when she had been much younger and more afraid.

Though, she supposes, being older doesn’t mean she’s less afraid of anything at present time.

Still, how does she even begin to answer _that_?

She muses over it, all the way to Chloe’s place and right up until Chloe envelops her in her arms. It’s the first time that week that they’re going to bother trying to go out, especially since Beca doesn’t know if she wants to hide, especially when Chloe is heading back to Atlanta over the weekend.

“Ready?” she asks Chloe, who is shrugging on a light jacket.

They’re not even planning on holding hands or anything. They just...want to get out of the house.

Beca’s kind of glad that her hands are firmly thrust into her pockets because they’re _swarmed_ the moment they get to their favourite coffee stop. It’s not a normally busy area so it feels a lot more open with less room to hide or duck away.

“Back off,” Chloe says as cheerfully as she can.

“Hey Beca! How’s it going?”

Beca tries not to roll her eyes even if she’s wearing sunglasses.

“Are you dating Chloe? Didn’t you both date men before?”

Beca’s fist clenches so hard that she feels her nails digging into her palm.

There’s more jeering. Beca hates that they’re all fairly large, older men, with no problem shoving their annoying, gigantic fucking cameras in their faces. Chloe seems less fazed by it, but she does shuffle Beca further by standing closer to her and gently pushing her at her back.

Then, Beca catches a new question from somewhere behind her: “Which one of you is the man?!”

It all feels so surreal, like she’s underwater.

She just wants to stay afloat.

Chloe gently coaxes her hand out of her pocket when they’re safely in the corner of the coffee shop and rubs soothingly at the crescent-shaped indents in her palm.

She doesn’t want to drift away and take Chloe with her.

 

* * *

 

“Why did you want to hide this?”

Beca’s brow furrows. “I didn’t... _want_ to hide anything, when I first started out. I just wanted to make music.”

 

* * *

 

Chloe catches some flack from it all, though since Beca never mentioned her name specifically in her tweet storm, she gets to retreat into the background temporarily.

Beca is both grateful and lonely in some respects.

She overhears Chloe on the phone with Aubrey one morning, as she’s about to ask Chloe if she wants a cup of coffee.

Dressed in an oversized shirt, with her hair up in a messy bun, Beca thinks that Chloe shouldn’t quite sound so angry, but she does.

“Well, I want to support her, Bree. I can’t _not_ say something. She’s my girlfriend!”

Pause.

“What if I just quit the movie?” she spits out. There’s another extended silence and Beca finds herself clenching her fists. “No, no - I’m sorry. I know. I’m going back to Atlanta in a couple days. Thanks for helping clear things up with them, though. I know they were really understanding. Should we send them something…”

Beca turns and walks into the kitchen when she hears Chloe’s conversation come to a close. Though she still sounded aggravated by the end, she looks more cheerful than Beca expects.

Still, she can’t help the little huff that escapes her as she takes in Chloe’s casual ease. “I’m not a child, you know,” she says before she can help herself.

Chloe blinks and turns to face her slowly. “I know that.”

“You don’t have to baby me.”

Chloe nods, waiting patiently.

“Everybody wants to know _why_ I did it,” Beca spits out. She’s not sure where the anger comes from and it’s definitely not anger she feels directed towards Chloe, but anger nonetheless that is happening in Chloe’s presence. “But nobody wants to know how I feel. Like _three_ people have asked me how I’m doing and whether I want this to be my sole defining trait.”

“Bec,” Chloe says gently.

“That’s all headlines are ever going to say!” Beca exclaims. “Gay pop star. Gay musician. Lesbian icon. Whatever.” She trails off, losing steam as suddenly as she gets it. “Why does it all matter?”

Chloe is in front of her in a blink and that’s when Beca finally takes in how tired Chloe looks as well. “It matters in whatever way you want it to matter,” Chloe says slowly. “You’re not expected to do or say anything that’ll make you uncomfortable, okay? You get to practice self-care. You get to be yourself. You get to _breathe_.” Chloe holds her shoulders gently. “Breathe, Bec.”

“I’m sorry,” Beca chokes out. She didn’t even realize she had started to cry. “This is such a mess.”

“I’ll help you clean it up,” Chloe says, pulling Beca into a warm hug.

“I...heard you on the phone,” Beca mumbles.

“With Aubrey?” Chloe doesn’t wait. “I figured, with that little outburst. I just want to support you, Beca. It would...help if I could be there with you for all these interviews. If people knew who I was to you.”

Briefly, all Beca thinks about is how terrible it would be for Chloe to be cast under any negativity; she feels like it is her cross to bear alone.

But Chloe has never wanted it to be like that between them - and she never will, Beca knows this now.

Beca waits a moment before she pushes past the cacophony of noise in her head. “Why do you love me?” she asks, wondering if there are parts worth redeeming.

Chloe scoffs, the action and sound jostling Beca a little. She lifts her head from Chloe’s shoulder, watching her favourite eyes for any sign of hesitance.

She finds none. She’s not sure what she expected.

“I think the real question is,” Chloe says slowly. “Is why can’t I figure out how to quit you?”

Beca flushes at that. “Okay, why?”

“Simple,” Chloe shrugs, like she had an answer all along. “It never occurred to me, that I’d want to leave. It never occurred to me that I’d want to be apart from you in any way that would mean me leaving your life.”

“I love you,” Beca blurts, because it’s all she can say to that. “God,” she says hastily. “I’ve cried like a million times this week.”

“You baby,” Chloe teases. She cups Beca’s cheeks and kisses her, in the middle of her kitchen.

“You have to go back to Atlanta,” Beca murmurs. It’s more of a statement than a question.

Chloe just hums quietly in response. “Yeah, but I’ll be back.”

 

* * *

 

Beca gazes down at the proffered pen and paper from a fan. There’s tentative hope in her eyes, though it goes beyond being starstruck, Beca recognizes.

“Who should I make it out to?” Beca asks softly.

“My name is Danielle.” She looks nervous, then. “Thank you, by the way.”

“For what?” Beca hands the pen and paper back.

“For...everything. Even if it did come out in a series of, uh, tweets. You don't have to explain why you did it, by the way. I understand.”

Beca smiles.

 

* * *

 

It is the day Chloe is slated to leave for Atlanta.

Beca feels marginally more relaxed, but she can’t help but feel restless.

She decides to take Jenn’s offer for an event that she had been invited to: Elle’s Women in Hollywood. She supposes it’d be a good way to be with her peers and contemporaries while also keeping her mind off things.

She also just wants to feel less judged.

It feels like the only way to move forward, out of her mental block, is to face everything head-on.

"Everything" being Hollywood, and "head-on" being a specific kind of nonchalance that seems to be the norm for Hollywood celebrities these days.

The red carpet is small, but bustling. She supposes Jenn had put out a notice that she’d be attending because the cameras are already clicking by the time she steps out of the car.

She nervously tucks a stray hair behind her ear, holding onto her clutch as a lifeline of sorts. She had refused to take Jenn with her, promising that she wouldn’t answer any questions. She does have a PA helping her stop to take photos, but other than that, Beca finds solitude in not answering any questions.

She has decided that she won’t answer anymore until Chloe finishes her movie and can join her. It is something that they talked about at length before Chloe went back home to pack for Atlanta again.

“Why did you do this,” Beca mutters to herself. She sighs, turning to flash a smile in the general direction of the photography pit.

Suddenly, however, there is an uproar of noise and flashes. Beca startles, thinking that she had done something embarrassing to warrant that, but she realizes belated that the noise isn’t for her, not even close.

She turns to see Chloe striding down the red carpet towards her. Shockingly, Aubrey is nowhere in sight, nor are any other people that Chloe would normally bring with her to a red carpet.

Beca takes a moment to appreciate how impressively gorgeous Chloe looks, with her stylishly messy over-the-shoulder braid, paired with an attractively determined expression on her face.

Beca zeroes in on _that_ especially since Chloe seems to be making a beeline right towards her, bypassing the calls of her name on the carpet.

The carpet is thankfully short and soon, Chloe is standing right in front of her, eye level with Beca. Beca congratulates herself on wearing slightly higher heels than she normally would.

“Beca,” Chloe says simply.

“Why are you here?” Beca wants to ask.

She _wants_ to ask, but she doesn’t have time - not even a second to breathe.

The “why” barely leaves her lips when Chloe cuts her off with by putting her hands around Beca - one securely on Beca’s back and the other cupping the back of Beca’s head gently. Beca barely has time to _blink_ before Chloe is kissing her with everything she has, gently pressing her lips against Beca’s.

She doesn’t have to ask why - not anymore - because Chloe is _here_ and Chloe never wavers, not once, even when she draws back, leaving Beca breathless and wanting in full view of the world.

She scrubs the target away - the one Beca had felt looming - and links their hands.

“Sorry I was late,” Chloe murmurs. “Don’t ask why - just, my annoying girlfriend didn’t tell me she was planning on going to an event. I had to rush to get ready.”

Some things don't need lengthy explanations, after all, Beca thinks. They just  _are_. Gazing at Chloe, Beca feels a surprisingly unfamiliar warmth course through her, bubbling out of her in the form of a laugh.

Beca can only laugh.

She laughs like she hasn’t in public in a long time.


	5. slow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Busy schedules keep them apart while Beca’s on tour.
> 
> Day 5: road trip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title refers to “slow” by matoma ft. noah cyrus.

 

“But we’re going to be apart for so long,” Beca groans, her voice coming out on a whine.

“It’s a month, Bec,” Chloe says, though she makes no move to get up even though they probably should have made more of an effort about fifteen minutes earlier.

“A  _ month _ ,” Beca emphasizes. “A whole ass month.”

“You’re going on tour! Isn’t that exciting?” Chloe somehow always manages to find positivity in everything she does and in everything Beca does.

“Yes,” Beca grumbles. It’s true. It’s a little exciting and she’s only been prepping for it for a very long time.

“It’s kind of like travelling,” Chloe suggests, like she’s talking to a child. “Maybe you’ll grow to enjoy it, since it is part of how you make money.”

Beca smacks her stomach in retaliation for her sarcasm. Chloe just laughs and pulls Beca in for a kiss.  
  


* * *

 

 

**Entertainment Tonight**

**_Beca Mitchell kicks off her end-of-summer tour in George, WA!_ **

 

_ The pop star begins her North American tour on the west coast, hitting all the best outdoor venues and amphitheaters available. The tour is sold out for the most part, but you can probably snag single tickets at various stops. _

_ Mitchell’s second studio album was released earlier this year, topping the Billboard chart. _

 

**Related** :  _ Chloe Beale and Beca Mitchell enjoy a date night at Nobu in West Hollywood! See photos here. _

  
  


* * *

 

 

Interestingly, as she passes Seattle, she feels no urge to go home. She continues on without looking back.

It kind of feels like a cross-country trek. Beca isn’t driving, herself, so she wanders up and down the tourbus, feeling confined as she watches the scenery pass by.

It feels like something she’d enjoy doing with Chloe - something she’d want to do in the future maybe.

She sends dumb photos to Chloe whenever she can. Random blurry shots of passing trees out the window. Haphazard stealth shots of fans who try to sneak photos of her.

Chloe’s reply is always the same:  _ i wish i was there with you! _

**Beca  
** _ Same, honestly. _

 

* * *

  
  


Beca adores touring. She’s grateful that her entire tour wasn’t cancelled by some other worldly deity or because of her recent sexuality reveal.

In fact, she’d say there’s more enthusiasm than usual, which she is immensely relieved to notice.

Still, being on the road again means that at least her mind is occupied enough to not think too much about all the press that still clamours for an interview from her. She still stops at the occasional news station in whatever city she’s in to do a quick introduction and morning segment, but other than that, Beca feels like she doesn’t have to keep glancing over her shoulder at every turn.

And hearing the live reactions to her music and creative endeavours? Beca will gladly spend hours in the August heat if it means having that kind of rush and validation.

There’s also something freeing about stopping at various cities and playing these amazing outdoor venues. The summer feels fleeting, somehow, but Beca can’t  _ wait _ to see what her future with Chloe will bring.

Speaking of- 

She glances down at her phone, waiting for a text from Chloe. 

Nothing.

She holds back her disappointment, knowing that Chloe is likely busy with press tour preparations herself, especially with her upcoming movie, new season of her Netflix series, and countless other projects.

Between the two of them, they struggle to maintain an organized calendar.

Beca smiles half-heartedly at the stage manager that passes her, gesturing at his watch. “Gotcha,” she mumbles to herself mostly.

Touring is fun, but it’s interesting to note how different it feels now that Beca recognizes that she has something she’d rather be returning home to as opposed to a hotel room.

She notes that at least she’ll be seeing Chloe in a couple days, when they both find themselves in the greater NYC area. It’ll be the first time Beca gets to see her this month, now that her tour is finally wrapping up. She’s going to hang out with Chloe for a few days before she heads off to Philadelphia.

Finally, just as she’s about to go on, she gets a text. She stops her assistant from taking her phone, snatching it back quickly. Muttering an apology, she swipes it open, grinning at the message she sees.

 

**Chloe  
** _ Make sure nobody’s throwing themselves or any of their clothes at you, tonight!!! xx _

Beca snorts. Chloe had never quite gotten over that the first time it had happened.

**Beca  
** _ Love you, weirdo. x _

**Chloe  
** _ Love you too. You’re going to kill it! Now, I’m going to finish reading this book if it kills me. _

**Beca  
** _ Get some rest! _

“Now that the wife has checked in, are you good to go?” Beca’s PA, Hannah, asks, a teasing grin on her face. She holds a hand out for Beca’s phone.

Beca rolls her eyes. “Not my wife," she drawls. "Guard it with your life!” she calls, like she does every night, at Hannah’s retreating back.

“Sure!”

She pauses. “Wait, come back here. I have to ask you to do something for me, for after the show.”

Hannah nods slowly as she takes in Beca’s instructions. “Gotcha,” she says quickly, before disappearing.

Thinking about Chloe and their future together is something Beca has been doing more often. Even as she preps to go on stage, she wonders what Chloe had for  _ dinner _ .

She feels like a nerd, but she supposes there isn’t anything wrong with that. Especially not when she feels the happiest she has in months.

She smiles as the lights descend and the crowd roars.

 

* * *

 

 

**ELLE Magazine**

 

_ We’re sitting down with Chloe Beale today, talking to her about everything fashion, television, and her new-found romance with Beca Mitchell! _

_ [excerpt] _

_ ELLE: Is it hard, being away from each other for long stretches of time? _

_ CB: I wouldn’t say they’re long stretches of time - especially when I consider how long we’ve actually been together. Nine months, now? _

_ ELLE: That’s practically years, you know. _

_ CB: [laughing] Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on. _

_ ELLE: What’s your favourite part about dating a musician? _

_ CB: Oh, the constant, constant singing. She is incredibly talented and I’m so blessed to be able to see that every day. I miss it now that she’s on tour. On the road? Isn’t that what they call it. [laughter] I know she’s having an amazing time! I’m so happy that she gets to share her talent with her very enthusiastic fans. _

_ ELLE: Good enthusiasm? _

_ CB: Ha. How long do you have? _  
  


* * *

 

After her show, Beca stops to chat with a few stage managers before making a beeline for Hannah.

“Hey,” Hannah greets. “Great show as usual. A little pitchy.”

Beca is too distracted for a rejoinder. “Did you get the car?” she asks.

Hannah nods, handing Beca a key. “You decided you’re going to do it, then?”

“Yeah. I can’t  _ not  _ do it. New York is right there.”

“It is a drive, though.” 

“I could get out of the tour bus for once,” Beca points out. “And what if I miss driving?”

“You  _ hate  _ driving,” Hannah says blandly. “God, I wish my husband were more like you.”

“It’s more about the destination I have in mind,” Beca mutters. “Thanks, by the way.”

“No prob, boss. Uh, you  _ told  _ people you were doing this, right?”

“...yes,” Beca says, trying to casually pull out her phone and compose the text she did not send.

Hannah waves her off. “You know what? Don’t worry about. You’ve wasted enough precious time. I’ll handle it.”

Beca clutches her phone to her chest. “I knew I hired you for a reason.”

“Just...message somebody when you get there. Or get Chloe to post a cute photo of you on Instagram!”

Beca rolls her eyes at the reminder that Chloe’s zest for social media didn’t slow or die down when their relationship became public knowledge. In fact, Beca’s pretty sure that Chloe just finds excuses to posts  _ more  _ photos of her to piss off the more aggressive naysayers. 

“I’ll text you,” she says, knowing full well that Chloe will jump right on that opportunity to post a photo.

 

* * *

 

_ “We’re sitting down with Beca Mitchell, here on Breakfast Television!” _

_ Beca smiles, waving awkwardly at the camera. “Thanks for having me.” _

_ “So you’re in town for a tour?” _

_ “Yep! A little outdoor amphitheater tour. I’m excited because it’s the first time performing my new stuff.” _

_ “You’re more than halfway through. Tiring you out at all?” _

_ “Oh totes,” Beca says before she can stop herself. Chloe’s mannerisms have rubbed off on her. She fights the blush threatening to bloom. “It’s all part of the experience, though. I’m very excited to perform for everybody.” _

_ “Has your girlfriend made it out to any of your shows?” _

_ “Unfortunately she’s been busy on the East Coast with her own projects. I’m looking forward to meeting up with her soon, though.” _

_ The anchor smiles knowingly. “Miss her?” _

_ “All the time,” Beca says truthfully. She definitely bursts into a full on blush when they aww and coo at her. _

_ God, Chloe’s going to eat that up and never let her live it down. _

 

* * *

 

Beca isn’t the biggest fan of driving, that is true. She listens to music to pass time, but focuses more on getting there in one piece. 

As she’s winding down her drive, she glances at the time. It’s nearing 1 a.m. but she knows instinctively that Chloe is still awake.

Girlfriend intuition and all.

She turns off the music and navigates the car menu carefully until she finds Chloe’s name.

Chloe picks up on the first ring.

“Hey, you.”

Beca smiles. “What are you doing up?”

Chloe sighs dramatically. “You know, just waiting for my superstar girlfriend to call me like she always does. She’s  _ so  _ busy. Too busy for little old me.”

“Who wouldn’t make time for you? I would,” Beca says haughtily.

Chloe giggles. “What are you doing right now, Bec?”

“Oh, you know,” Beca says ensuring that her GPS is muted. “Just living totally glamorously, on a tour bus.”

“No hotel tonight?”

“Nope, we’re hitting road. Looks like I’ll be seeing you sooner than expected,” she says slyly. She can see the hotel.

Chloe hums. “...and what would happen when you see me?”

Beca parks carefully, ensuring that she’s making as little noise as possible. “I’d kiss you,” she says, keeping her voice down. “But first, tell me something,” she says, bypassing the front desk. She puts her finger to her lips when a receptionist seemingly recognizes her and does a double take.

“What?” Chloe murmurs.

“...what’s your hotel room number?” Beca ducks into the elevator.

Chloe pauses. “That’s different.”

Beca stifles a laugh. “I’m just trying to set a scene, Chlo. You’re an actress! Roll with it.”

“You’re so weird! Okay, okay. I’m in room 1694. It has a great bathroom, but its best feature is the very large, lonely king sized bed I’m lying on.”

Beca barely manages to punch the sixteenth floor button correctly. “Oh? And…”

“Ask me what I’m wearing,” Chloe says, taking over.

Beca swallows. “What are you wearing?”

“Your favourite sweater.” Beca can  _ hear  _ the smirk. 

She stands in front of the door. “Show me,” she murmurs, with restraint.

“Like, a photo?” Chloe asks.

Beca knocks, then, before Chloe can say more things that will ensure Beca slips up.

Chloe is quiet for a moment as she processes. “There’s somebody at the door.”

“Open the door,” Beca murmurs, trying to keep her voice low. “Maybe it’s Aubrey.” She knocks again.

“Beca?” Chloe asks, her voice rising in excitement. 

“Room service,” she calls through the wood.

She doesn’t even have time to hang up. There’s a pause as Beca’s sure Chloe is looking through the peephole, then, the door all but flies open and Chloe’s eyes are alight with surprise, love, and excitement. Beca still has her phone to her ear. “Beca!” She pulls at Beca’s forearms, pulling her into the hotel room. “Beca, what are you doing here?! How... _ how _ are you here?” Chloe asks, squinting at her. 

Beca thinks she must look as exhausted as she feels, but she’s just ridiculously happy to see Chloe again, after that long drive.

“I drove,” she answers belatedly. 

“You - you  _ what _ ? From where?” Chloe asks incredulously. 

“Foxborough.”

“That’s like...that’s at least four hours,” Chloe says, mentally consulting the map in her head. She draws Beca further into the hotel room. “What were you thinking?” She rummages around her open luggage.

Beca thinks that the way Chloe exudes nothing but care, affection, and love is something she’d love to see for the rest of her life. The thought is so brief, but as intrusive as ever and it makes Beca take pause; makes her take stock of her life and how it finally feels like it’s  _ something _ . 

As she watches Chloe fuss over her, watches her grumble with no real bite, all she can think is how nice it would be if she just got to...experience that every day. She also notes appreciatively that  Chloe is really wearing her favourite sweater. Beca thinks that it looks infinitely better on her girlfriend, admiring the slope of Chloe’s neck and the loose neckline.

“You’re crazy,” Chloe mutters from where she’s zipping her bag back up. “You must be so tired. I can’t believe you. What were you thinking?” she asks again.

While the distance and their jobs keeps them apart, Beca thinks four-hour drives are nothing - not when she has Chloe to come home too.

_Home,_ being more of a feeling, as opposed to a physical place.

“I love you,” Beca murmurs, as Chloe hands her a spare t-shirt to sleep in. It’s all she can think to say - it’s the only thing that echoed through her mind from the moment she made the decision to drive to Manhattan. It’s something that can’t wait another day and Chloe deserves to hear it all the time. “That’s what I was thinking.”

Chloe’s arm lowers and her entire body softens. She doesn’t quite look so tired and concerned anymore, but rather, she looks quietly pleased, like this was a very specific action that Beca performed to show her affection.

“I love you, too,” Chloe replies, reaching up to cup Beca’s cheek with her free hand. She rubs her thumb over her skin for a moment, her eyes searching for something thoroughly in Beca’s eyes. When she draws back, she looks more content than Beca can ever remember seeing.

“Wait,” Beca says, pulling Chloe back into her. She puts her hands on Chloe’s shoulders and leans up to press a kiss to her lips, intent on keeping it gentle and light. Chloe immediately pulls her closer, deepening and intensifying the sensation with a tilt of her head. “Your promised kiss,” she murmurs.

“I can’t believe you drove yourself because you didn’t want to wait just one more day.”

“It feels like the most believable thing I’ve done all month,” she says honestly. Chloe’s eyes glisten suspiciously. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.” Chloe smiles happily. She holds Beca’s hand, her thumb immediately finding the metal band of Beca’s favourite thumb ring and rubbing over it instinctively. “I don’t deserve you.”

_ On the contrary _ , Beca thinks. “You deserve the world,” she says aloud. “But let’s start with the fact that I drove across state lines for you.”

Chloe laughs and it’s the most delightful sound to come home to, especially after miles and miles on the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, come chat with me on [tumblr](http://isthemusictoblame.tumblr.com/)! Love you all :3 I'm a bit backlogged on comments, so I'll be going through those and replying. Also, you should check out my one-shot set in the _remember the day_ universe!


	6. gold dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca Mitchell reflects on loss and gain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title refers to “gold dust” by sykes. check out my [tumblr](http://isthemusictoblame.tumblr.com/tagged/show%20me%20where%20my%20armor%20ends) for fic aesthetics.

**_then_ **

_“Beca, I want you to have these. They’re nothing too fancy, but I think they’re beautiful and you always mentioned that you liked them.”_

_Beca gazes upon the sparkling earrings winking back at her. She looks up at her mother. “But aren’t these like some kind of heirloom?”_

_Her mother laughs. “Of course not. I bought shortly after you graduated high school. I think they’d be better suited to you, however. I have all the faith in the world that you will succeed.”_

_They’re simple, small, hoops, but they mean the world to her._

_“And you’ll have a little piece of me, wherever you go.”_

_Beca’s eyes glisten, but she doesn’t cry._

 

* * *

 

_**now** _

Beca tries not to value too many material possessions. She’s most proud of her recording equipment, her phone, her laptop, and maybe a few choice items of clothing. Otherwise, she’s fairly content to rent gowns, buy the occasional pair of shoes here and there, and only pick up choice pieces of jewelry when she has the chance.

There is, however, a very specific pair of earrings that Beca treasures most.

First, they’re simple earrings that her mother bought for her when she first moved to Los Angeles. That alone makes them more valuable than most, especially since she especially values her relationship with her mother.

Second, they accentuate her ears just enough without detracting from the many other piercings she has adorning her left ear.

Third, she isn’t superstitious, but she definitely finds comfort in them, especially when she has very little to call her own these days in the media spotlight. They’re a reminder of what her life once was and they do their job in keeping her connected to what she loves the most.

There is a fourth bonus point, but Beca is a little shy about that. She’s pretty confident she had been wearing them when she first met Chloe at the Golden Globes after party, so there’s no way that she can’t not attribute good luck to these earrings.

So, it’s a little bit of a jarring point in her life when she realizes she’s lost them or misplaced them, especially when she has a huge meeting coming up as well as an award show appearance.

She watches over her girlfriend, because she isn't able to shake the overwhelming protectiveness that courses through her veins. She doesn't want to think too negatively, but she isn’t the world’s biggest optimist; she isn’t an optimist at all, never was. Not even when she had been relatively carefree.

She knows – and she knows that Chloe knows just as well - what happens when fame -  overwhelming, worldwide fame – is highlighted by rumours, negativity, and insistent press.

Beca thinks that she is dealing with it; in fact, she’s living with it.

But now, she’s living through it with Chloe. Chloe is willing to stand steadfast by her side, which means that Beca can’t offer any more protection than before.

She can't make the cameras turn to her instead, because they seek out both Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale without fail.

They lie in wait, wanting to capture private moments and intimate embraces just to be consumed by a heavily judgmental public.

Now that Beca’s back from her tour, she takes stock of everything around her. She spends time at Chloe’s house more and more, enjoying the way the breeze ruffles Chloe’s hair when they fall asleep with the balcony window slightly open.

She enjoys the way Chloe brings her coffee sometimes, but mostly enjoys waking up to Chloe’s kisses against her face.

The press is mostly lenient. Sometimes, a little critical without room for error – where error is just a fact of Beca being human and letting her protective side come out when the paparazzi swarm them.

Chloe can handle herself, however – more than Beca realizes. Often, Beca thinks that Chloe is protecting her and she loves her everyday for that.

But Beca still fears a lashback - some kind of popping of their ridiculously comfortable bubble - that’ll remind her that happiness can’t last forever.

Now, losing her favourite earrings, she fears that is the case and she’s due for her awakening.

“Fuck,” she mumbles, rifling through her dresser.

“Babe,” Chloe says, wandering into the room. “What do you want to do for dinner?”

“I...whatever you want,” Beca says distractedly.

Chloe takes note of her aggravated mood. “What’s wrong?”

“I just,” Beca blew out a breath of air. “I can’t find my earrings.”

“You can borrow mine,” Chloe suggests.

Beca recognizes that Chloe is being helpful above all, but can’t help the spasm her face makes.

Chloe laughs at her expression. “Or not.” She leans over to press a kiss to Beca’s cheek. “I’m sure you’ll find them, babe. I’m going to order some pizza, okay?”

Beca blows out a breath.

 

* * *

 

 

_“I love this song!” Chloe calls over the sound of music._

_Beca blinks, unsure why Chloe Beale is speaking to her of all people. “Sorry? I missed that.” It’s not quite what Beca expected when her agent mentioned she had secured an invite to the Golden Globes after party._

_“Want to dance?”_

_Beca stares straight into the bluest eyes she’s ever seen and finds herself falling immediately._

_For once, her inhibitions don’t seem to be holding her back._

_“Yes, absolutely,” she says with confidence she gathers from somewhere deep within her._

_She puts her hand in Chloe’s, letting her lead the way, wondering how she got so lucky._

 

* * *

 

Chloe finds her on the floor of her bathroom, crying, of all things.

“Beca,” she whispers. She throws her bag to the side before kneeling next to where Beca is sitting, knees pulled up to her chest. “Beca, what’s wrong?”

Beca hiccups. “It’s stupid,” she says softly, trying to maintain a steady tone.

“I’m sure it’s not, if it’s making you cry like this,” Chloe murmurs, moving so she’s sitting next to Beca. She puts her arm around her. “What happened?”

“I...I lost my earrings.”

Chloe is silent, focusing on squeezing Beca’s shoulders.

“See? You think it’s stupid,” Beca says, feeling a fresh onslaught of tears.

“I don’t,” Chloe replies immediately. “But...tell me why they’re so important to you.”

Beca shudders. “I...my mom gave them to me.”

“Okay.”

“And...I like to bring a little part of her with me, no matter where I go.”

“You never really talk about her,” Chloe murmurs. “But she sounds amazing and I’m glad that because of her, I have you now.”

It only makes Beca cry harder because she wishes more than anything that her two favourite people in the world could have met, but she realizes that the world doesn’t work out that way.

“And you have me,” Chloe adds, pressing her forehead against the side of Beca’s head. “You want to know something a little silly?”

Beca sniffles, but nods.

Chloe lifts her own hand and rests it on Beca’s knee so they can both stare at Chloe’s hand.

“What?” Beca asks. She’s not sure what she’s supposed to be assessing other than how nice and soft Chloe’s hand looks.

“The ring,” Chloe points out, wiggling her thumb.

Beca blinks, staring at it. It takes her a few seconds to place it.

“That’s mine,” she says unnecessarily. She’s not mad - not even close. She barely noticed she was missing a ring from the many she owns already.

“Yes,” Chloe agrees.

“You stole my ring?” Beca asks.

Chloe nudges her gently. “It’s kind of my lucky charm, you know?”

“What do you need luck for?” Beca murmurs, tilting her head so it’s resting on Chloe’s shoulder.

“It’s less about luck,” Chloe says slowly. She turns her hand over, opening her palm up for Beca to take. Their fingers slide together easily. “It’s more that I want to take a little piece of you wherever I go. And to remind me that there’s something worth coming home to.”

“Oh,” Beca manages to exhale.

That feels familiar, enough.

Beca can relate.

 

* * *

 

After that, Beca finds herself able to breathe again.

Beca is a little nervous about her upcoming meeting with Disney execs. Ever since the fallout from her Twitter explosion months ago, she had been unsure if her future would hang in the balance. While she knows her career would be fine without the voice-acting job, she still feels a pang of disappointment at the thought of potentially losing it.

The conversation had been lengthy and slow, with contracts being regularly sent to her, without mention of The Incident, as Beca has dubbed it.

Chloe assures her that everything will work out.

Beca kind of wants to ask Chloe to go with her, but she’d hate to burden Chloe and pull her out of her errands to just accompany her.

But, Beca knows that Chloe will never deny her; just as she has never, ever wavered since day one.

“Chlo,” she says softly, mustering up the confidence. She thinks, that after almost one entire year of dating, that she’d be more confident and sure, but it’s something she works on every day.

Chloe glances up from her laptop. “Bec,” she says back, easily. Naturally. She searches Beca’s face for a clue of some kind. Finding none, she waits patiently.

“Will you…come with me today? To the meeting,” Beca clarifies. “Like, you can just...I don’t know, drop me off, or maybe just come in with me? Is that okay?”

Chloe closes her laptop. “Are you sure? I was...going to ask if you wanted me to come with you, but I didn’t want to overstep.”

Beca nods, moving to sit with her girlfriend. “Yeah. I just...I just feel better when you’re around, I guess. I don’t know why I’m so nervous. It’s just. Agh.” She gestures with her hands. “It’s been on my mind over the past few weeks. I’m sure you’ve noticed.”

She receives a nod in response. “Understandable.” Chloe tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’d be more worried if you weren’t concerned about it. Of course I’ll come with you.” She tugs on Beca’s ear for emphasis and for fun. “Try and stop me.”

As Chloe’s fingers graze her ear, there’s a very specific warmth that rushes through Beca, almost like everything she needs is right there and has been there the whole time.

It’s akin to opening her eyes for the first time, or turning around and taking a breath of fresh air; it’s saying “oh, there you are. I’ve been waiting for you my entire life.”

It’s becoming more and more common.

 

 

* * *

 

 

They don’t actually get to attend an event together again until November - the People’s Choice Awards. Beca thinks that it is somehow fitting that their first official public appearance together - she doesn’t count when Chloe surprised her - is one year after the first time they ever kissed, at the same award show.

“You look beautiful,” Chloe says, placing her hand on Beca’s thigh. “I’m so lucky.”

Beca flushes at the compliment. “You’re one to talk,” she mumbles, leaning in to kiss Chloe. Her eyes flutter closed when Chloe’s free hand comes up to cup her cheek amidst their kiss.

“Are you nervous?” Chloe asks quietly, when she notices Beca’s leg is bouncing up and down.

“A little. I don’t know why. You did all the hard work.”

Chloe grins. “What do you mean?”

“You know, with all the-” Beca gestures with her hands. “-the kissing on the red carpet, back when...” she trails off awkwardly.

“Kissing,” Chloe says thoughtfully. “I don’t quite recall. Remind me?”

Beca rolls her eyes. “Shut up,” she mutters, but not before grabbing Chloe’s face and planting one on her.

“I’m so glad Aubrey isn’t here,” Chloe mumbles, through increasingly passionate kisses. “This might be awkward.”

Beca exhales, laughing a little. “I’m usually happy about that,” Beca says nonchalantly. She pulls back, gently wiping at the smudge of lipstick at the corner of Chloe’s mouth. “Need a little touch-up, babe.”

Chloe smiles and does the same for Beca. Quietly, they mentally and physically prepare themselves as they pull up to the venue. Beca watches the way Chloe closes her eyes and breathes slowly, like she needs to gather her wits and collect every ounce of strength.

Beca thinks Chloe is one of the strongest people she knows.  She has never been more proud to stand by somebody’s side.

“One last kiss for good luck?” Chloe suggests cheekily.

“Not that we need it,” Beca parries back. Chloe smiles with delight that reaches her eyes. Leaning in, she presses a chaste kiss against Beca’s lips before the car slows to a stop and their door is being opened.

Together, they face the flashing lights.

 

 

* * *

 

_“And here we are with both Beca Mitchell and Chloe Beale! You two look stunning tonight.”_

_“Thanks Ryan,” Beca says, smiling at Chloe and then him. “Always a pleasure.”_

_“So, who are you two wearing tonight?”_

_Chloe gestures at her dress, a gorgeous white, fitted cut. “Monique Lhuillier.”_

_Beca points at herself. “Narcisco Rodriguez.”_

_“And was this intentional?” Ryan asks, pointing at their complementary black-and-white-aesthetic dresses._

_“Was what intentional, Ryan?” Beca asks with uncharacteristic playfulness. She can just tell that Chloe is grinning from ear to ear._

_“Oh come on! The matching dresses. Those smiles,” he says, pointing the mic at their faces._

_Beca looks up at Chloe, sure that there’s going to be adoration on her face for her to see again splashed across the internet._

_“I don’t kiss and tell,” Chloe says lightly, like she’s commenting on any other project of her own. “But maybe this was my girlfriend’s idea and I’ll defer to her for that.”_

_Ryan laughs and gestures back towards Beca. “Are you nervous at all about tonight? I know you’re up for two awards: Favorite Female Artist and Favorite Social Media Celebrity.”_

_“I’m not nervous,” Beca says honestly. “I have my own personal good luck charm.”_

_“That’s me,” Chloe says, mock-haughtily._

_Beca laughs and lets Chloe kiss her on the cheek in full view of the world._


	7. i like me better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> day 7: disney
> 
> Chloe Beale goes to Disneyland. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come say hi to me on [tumblr](http://isthemusictoblame.tumblr.com/)!
> 
> And once more before I go, fic title is from "Pluto" by Sleeping At Last. Chapter title refers to "I Like Me Better" by Lauv.

Growing up, Chloe always wondered what it would be like to be a Disney princess. She had also begged and begged her parents to take her when she was younger, but they had refused, citing bad timing and monetary struggles.

Then, her career had taken off and she hadn’t thought about it.

Not until she picked up that music video gig with Beca Mitchell.

And now, in the best, most serious, most stable, and healthiest relationship she’s ever been in, Beca holds true to a promise made nearly three years ago - a subtle text of all things and brings them on a mini vacation to Anaheim.  


* * *

 

 

Before nearly every ride, Beca mutters something along the lines of “why am I doing this?”

To which Chloe responds, “Because you love me.”

Beca never says anything in response to that. She simply holds Chloe’s hand as best as she can before she’s screaming and cursing Chloe’s name for dragging her here.

 

* * *

 

“Hey you should ask her if she dyes her hair,” Beca suggests, pointing at Ariel who is waving and gesturing at them to take pictures with her.

“Is that your idea of a pick-up line?” Chloe asks in return. “ _You_ go take a photo with her. I know you have a crush on her.”

Beca flushes immediately. “No? I was just - ugh. I hate you.”

“You love redheads,” Chloe says, grinning at how aggravated Beca is becoming. It’s so easy to rile her up.

“So what if I do?”

“Do you two want a photo or not?” ‘Ariel’ asks, jolting them both out of their intense staring. “There are actual children waiting.”

“Yes please,” they both mumble, eyes downcast.  


* * *

 

 

Beca thinks there is something very, very wrong with making out at an amusement park that is crawling with children.

Of course, what she thinks and what she actually does are two very different things.

There’s something about the intensity in Chloe’s eyes when they start their “It’s a Small World” cruise that makes her cave almost immediately.

 

* * *

 

 

They’re standing in front of that majestic castle, tinged with blue. The skies are clear and the sun is hot.

But Beca doesn’t want to move, not when she’s standing right next to Chloe Beale.

Chloe leans against the railing, on arm around Beca’s waist as they quietly watch the gentle ripple of the water. It’s not much to see, really, but it’s a peaceful moment.

“Good day?” Beca asks, leaning into Chloe’s side. They’re both a little warm and more than a little sweaty, but she finds comfort in how softly she sinks into Chloe, as naturally as ever.

“The best,” Chloe sighs happily. “This is the vacation I needed,” she says, stretching her legs a little.

Beca nods, understandingly. Chloe had been filming a movie in New York over the past month and before that, she had been working on her series, which had kept them apart for almost two and a half months. She had missed Chloe desperately, finding excuses whenever she could to fly back and forth.

“Are we going home now?” Chloe asks, noting that they’ve stopped exploring. “Or do you want to get one last ride?”

It’s almost early evening, but people still mill about them, not really noticing who they are, despite the fact that they got stopped only a couple times for photos or autographs.

“I do have something I want to do,” Beca says lightly. She takes her baseball cap off and ruffles her hair to get it to fall into place messily.

"You know, when I was seventeen and just about to graduate high school," Beca says, drumming her fingers against the stone of the railing. "I had this...fantasy. It was what - what my life would be like by the time I turned twenty-five. Visions, dreams, goals – you name it."

"You’re twenty-seven now,” Chloe says, a teasing smile on her lips.

“And you’re twenty-nine, almost thirty,” Beca points out, pouting.

Chloe laughs, gently touching Beca’s pouty lower lip with her thumb. “Okay, sorry, continue.” She reaches out to squeeze Beca’s hand reassuringly.

"I just…wow. The reality is so much better, especially with you. Even if I have lulls in my career, I know you’ll be there.”

"You won’t have lulls," Chloe promises instantly. "You're so talented."

"I love your faith in me," Beca murmurs with a soft smile.

"It's not faith, Bec,” Chloe says gently. “It's just a fact.”

Beca bites her lip, shrugging as she lets go of Chloe's hand briefly to grasp the railing again. She fidgets, letting her knuckles turn white as she tightens her grasp.

"My point is," Beca pushes on determinedly, "I don't need the awards or the records or – or the validation from anybody else to be happy. Not anymore. I could stop touring tomorrow, if I wanted,” Beca says, pausing as she contemplates the reality of how true that feels. “I could stop everything because I have you.”

There’s a brief silence, barring the sound of screaming and laughing children around them, but it fades to background noise as Beca stares straight at Chloe, feeling like she’s twenty-five again, filming a music video at this very location, wondering how she got so lucky to have met Chloe at all.

Chloe’s brow furrows, wondering if Beca’s trying to tell her something about her career – that she’s struggling with something. She turns, eyebrows raised. “Did something happen? You’re starting to worry me a little, Beca,” she says slowly. She knows Beca had a meeting recently with Universal, in talks to work on a movie soundtrack and original music. It had been a _big_ deal in her house.

Beca huffs, loving and hating how concerned Chloe is in whatever situation they find themselves in. They’re literally _in_ Disneyland, having spent a full day – almost – on rides, screaming themselves hoarse. "I'm trying to be symbolic, Chlo. Could you just...?"

Chloe mimes zipping her lips, nodding seriously.

Beca nods, almost to herself, as she gathers her wits about her. She turns back to face the water, licking her lips a little nervously before facing Chloe once more, with renewed determination in her eyes.

Beca's smile wavers, and she swallows visibly, bracing her right hand against the railing.

“Beca,” Chloe breathes.

"I'm so in love with you," she murmurs, powering through. "I love this…this weird, crazy life we've built together. I love knowing that I get to wake up every morning to the one person – the only person - who knows me better than anyone. You know me better than I know myself sometimes and you still somehow love me for everything I am. That’s…” Beca reaches out to hold Chloe’s hand, leaving one hand on the railing steadily. “The good, the bad, and everything in between. You’ve seen me cry and scream and make a complete fool of myself on the red carpet, but you have never wavered. Not once, and it is my hope…not ever.”

“Never,” Chloe echoes, unable to help herself. She thinks people are starting to stare because they have been in one spot for a while now and Beca has removed her hat as well as propped her sunglasses up on her head.

“I love you in exactly the same way, Chloe," she says, voice light and carefree and enshrining everything Chloe has grown to love about Beca over the past two and a half years of being together.

Chloe's heartrate begins to speed – more than it had been before. She holds Beca’s hand tight and tries to remember how to just _breath_ e, while her mind spins with Beca's words—with the entire day. Beca obligingly agreeing to wearing matching t-shirts. Beca pulling strings to get them special tours and quiet moments away. The increased amount of PDA; the gentle and sweet kisses Beca had placed on her cheeks, lips, and hands over the course of the day.

Chloe feels herself already begin to tear up.

"I'm the best version of myself when I'm with you," Beca continues. “I feel like that was something I already knew while filming that music video. It feels like a lifetime ago, which I guess is true because I was living a very different life back then. Even though we met at the Golden Globes, I was waiting for the day I could see you again.”

“Beca,” Chloe says, though she has no real thought to follow that. She just has to say Beca’s name because she feels lightheaded and weak suddenly.

Beca pauses to lick her lips again, feeling her throat constrict nervously. “So now, I’m standing here, on this bridge, where I believe I found the will to just live my best life again…” She lifts her hand from the railing to reveal the small velvet box that had been resting comfortably underneath. Then, without warning, she slowly bends down on knee, gazing up at Chloe with all the hope and love in her eyes.

“I don’t need to film another music video here to know that standing next to you for the rest of my life is the only thing I need. Here, where dreams come true – where I realized it was okay to dream again – I want to know, just one small question.”

Chloe thinks she gasps, or maybe somebody in the crowd gasps – and yes, there are definitely people taking photos of them. Chloe can’t wait to read all about it.

Beca is still smiling tearfully as she opens the box, finally letting go of Chloe’s hand to do so. "Chloe Beale, will you please marry me and share my forever?"

Chloe silently replays the question several times in her mind as she stares at the ring through eyes blurred with tears. She hastily wipes at her tears, pushing her own sunglasses up on top of her head.

She can't quite believe what she's seeing, but she somehow manages to process enough with her haywire sense that she’s _seeing_  a diamond engagement ring (a beautiful one), which means that – that Beca definitely just proposed to her.

At Disneyland.

(God, she’s such a nerd.

And she definitely said _please_.

Chloe loves her so much. Her heart might burst.)

"Chloe?"

Her gaze lifts to Beca's face when she realizes she had been staring transfixed at the ring for a few moments. She notes, with a watery laugh, that Beca actually looks _scared_ and nervous. “God, yes Beca. As if I’d say anything else.”

She doesn’t wait for Beca to say anything in return, simply tugs Beca up, careful not to jostle her, and cups her cheeks, kissing her passionately and vigorously.

“Yes,” she repeats, mumbling it straight into Beca’s mouth. “Yes, yes, yes.” She pulls back with a sigh, holding Beca’s face close to hers. “A hundred times yes, I’ll marry you.” Chloe chokes back a tearful laugh, nodding her head vigorously as she drops her hand and breathes out, "Yes. Yes, yes, Beca," she reaches for her, bending down to kiss that beloved mouth and whisper, "yes, I'll marry you," against her lips.

She feels Beca smile more than she sees her, and Beca kisses her again, just once more, joyfully, before pulling the ring free of its box and reaching for Chloe's hand. They’re both shaking and Chloe thanks God that Beca didn’t drop the ring into the water or something horrible.

“Now you can stop stealing my rings,” Beca says, though it’s tinged with a tearful laugh, lacking any real bite.

“Never,” Chloe whispers back.

Watching Beca slide the ring into place, Chloe marvels at how wonderful this whole day had been.

She's so happy.

She has wanted this for _so long_ , but Beca never really mentioned marriage or serious commitment beyond the fact that they moved in together about eight months ago. Chloe had been too nervous to bring it up because she wanted to focus on the domestic bliss and comfortable bubble - at least until Beca gave her some kind of clue.

This is _so much better_ than she could have ever imagined. She _loves_ it when Beca surprises her.

"I love you so much, Beca Mitchell. Even if you are a giant, cheesy, nerd," Chloe whispers. "Nothing will make me happier than being your wife."

"My wife," Beca repeats with lopsided grin. "I really love the way that sounds," she murmurs as she slips her arms around Chloe's waist. There’s more cheering in the background, but once again, it fades to nothingness.

"Me too," Chloe agrees, looping her arms around Beca's neck and kissing her like she means it.

As they kiss, right in front of that famed castle, Chloe thinks that it is ridiculously poetic – or incredibly cheesy – that she just got _engaged_ , during her second-ever trip to Disneyland.

Beca is thinking the same thing, clearly, because she mutters “I’ve never gotten engaged in Disneyland before, so this is a treat.”

Chloe laughs, kissing Beca once again, resisting the urge to just wrap her legs around Beca’s waist. “There’s a first time for everything.”

“Shut up,” Beca laughs, trying to kiss her again.

Chloe lifts her hand to Beca's hair and buries it in the silken strands.

Now all she has to do is find an equally perfect ring for Beca because Chloe might be just a _little_ possessive and she maybe wants everyone to know that Beca is very much _taken_.

But for now, she’ll just enjoy the fireworks, well ahead of schedule.

 

* * *

 

**Entertainment Tonight**

**_The Latest:_  ** _Relationship upgrade! See the moment Beca Mitchell proposes to Chloe Beale at Disneyland!_


End file.
